Second Base Is Conversation: Building Trust Through Real Conversations
Relationships · From Student of the Game
Second Base Is Conversation: Building Trust Through Real Conversations
If Brad Noll can convince listeners of one thing in this episode, it is this: conversion only happens after conversation. Plenty of business owners post on social media, send messages, and sit in the office wondering when business will show up. Brad's point is that the introductions most businesses depend on never come without a meaningful conversation first.
This episode of Student of the Game is the second stop in Brad's series on the Relationships Win framework. First base was connect. Second base, the subject here, is conversation. Brad uses the image from his farming analogy in the last episode: "If a connection is the seed, then the conversation is the water."
Conversation Is the Gateway to Everything Else
Brad believes conversations are where trust gets built, and trust is one of his team's core values. In more than two decades in real estate, he says, he does not remember helping anyone buy a home without having a conversation. Not every connection leads to one. He may connect with ten people to land one or two good conversations, and over time he has learned to track those numbers.
He also sees the value of conversation beyond business. Brad is careful to say he is not a doctor, but he believes meaningful conversation helps people feel valued and is one way through a lot of challenges.
He shares a small example from a college visit with one of his kids. The talk drifted to which TV shows everyone was watching. Brad admits he does not watch much TV, but his wife and the coach found common ground. "They're not talking about TV," he says. "What they're doing is they're building trust."
“If a connection is the seed, then the conversation is the water. Are you watering? Are you watering right now?”
Brad Noll
Conversations Cannot Be Rushed
Brad has someone trying to get on his calendar right now to make a pitch, and it feels rushed. His advice to anyone in that seat: get to know the person, their business, their family, their schedule, and their challenges first. Then make the pitch. Do not start with an offer.
He points to The 12 Week Year and its coauthor Michael Lennington, who talks about greatness in the moment. Brad cannot control outcomes, but he can control whether he makes his connections today. Stack enough connections and the conversations follow.
He also warns about the person who spends the whole conversation on themselves. Brad and his dad joke about the line, "Enough about me. Let's talk about you. What do you think about me?" Everyone knows how that feels when it is done to them, Brad says, but are we paying attention when we are the ones doing it?
Heart Set Matters More Than Mindset
Brad's coaches talk to him a lot about mindset. He has come to believe there is something deeper. "Mindset's great," he says. "You know, it's more important than mindset. Heart set." When you text someone or sit down with them, is your heart postured toward what you can get, or toward how you can serve?
He quotes Stephen Covey: seek first to understand, then to be understood. He shares how he has been staying in touch with clients who paused their home purchase. Most agents would stop reaching out until they are ready to move. Brad told one of them his team is built to serve people even when they stay in their homes, with trusted tradespeople and the vendor list Lindsay keeps through Noll Team Interiors.
He also challenges the way many agents answer "how's business?" The usual reply is about being busy and homes selling in a day. If the person asking is quietly planning to sell and does not know where to go next, that answer only adds stress. Brad suggests turning it into a question about what they might need instead.
Three Conversation Starters That Get Past Small Talk
Brad's first rule is to ask, not pitch. People should know what you do, but you lead with curiosity and ask the next question. When a buyer says they want privacy or an open floor plan, his team asks them to describe what that means to them. The goal is to go a layer deeper than the weather and how busy everyone is. Brad's three go-to questions:
- What are you working on right now that excites you?
- What's been a big challenge for you lately? Every business has them, and pretending otherwise is what social media does.
- If I could connect you with anyone, what kind of person would that be? If you are ready to answer that one, Brad says, he knows how to help you.
That last question matters because you can find what you are looking for when you know what you are looking for. Brad tells of a friend in California whose family visited about ten churches before stopping to each write down what they wanted. When they compared lists, they realized the church they had just visited had most of it. Brad knows exactly who he wants to meet: people going through a lifestyle change that calls for a change in housing.
Two Partnerships That Grew From One Conversation
Years ago, Brad took a friend who ran a medical group to lunch at Baker Street and asked about his challenges. Two came up: recruiting and retention. That conversation led to something Brad's team still does today, giving community tours to physicians and medical practices that are hiring. The team rides along as a friendly third party outside the interview process, showing candidates the city.
The second story started on a phone call while Brad drove down I-69. His team needed a carpet cleaner to recommend to clients, and he called the owner of a newer company. He asked which agent sent them the most business. Then he said, "In 12 months, no one will send you more business than me." She ran into Brad recently and brought up that call. Brad shares that a large share of sellers hire a tradesperson before listing, so these relationships matter. To this day, that company has introduced more people to his team than most of his database.
The logical move would have been to ask for business. Brad led with a give instead, and he says that is what happens when you posture your heart correctly.
How Do You Turn Connections Into Real Conversations?
Brad's homework is simple. Identify three people you want to connect with. Reach out and ask about their challenges or what excites them, then ask the follow-up question. The goal is to listen, learn, and look for ways to serve.
He reminds listeners that some connections can be automated, through email campaigns, postcards, and social media. "But you can never automate conversations," he says. They have to be initiated, so do not wait for others to start them. He leaves listeners with a Zig Ziglar line he loves: help enough people get what they want, and you will have everything you want.
Coming up next in the series: third base, and the power of making introductions.
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Relationships Win Framework, on Student of the Game.
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